stop

Currently, I am so depressed. Everything cannot work well. Until last night when I was correcting my paper with Mat, My mother called me from Taipei. I could not control my emotion any more.
Now I am typing and crying, and I do not know what I really can do for my life and future. I keep doing what I believe since I had touched with critical theory. I do sacrifice what I really want, but I just cannot get a good environment to do my research. Suddenly, I notice that when I am struggling with this powerful system, my mother is waiting for me at somewhere. However, every time I just only let her feel disappointed. She does not ask me do anything for her, and I never do anything for my family and society. Now, I don’t even have any courage and ability to continue my studying.
Until now I still cannot stop my tears coming out. I try to finding something that might help me feel better. So I got this. However, it does not work.

Shit